Overweight and doing something about it

Why is it everytime I go on Vacation I eat like its going out of style. Like every meal is my last meal. I hate it and can’t seem to get it under control. UGH!

 I started the couch to 5k on Thursday and for 25 minutes I endured it. Felt slightly embarrassed because my jiggly bits were shaking all over the place, as if my feet were the epicenter of an earthquake and my body were the seismic waves rippling throughout. I sweat a lot more on the treadmill than on the elliptical, why is it?

I still continue to lose weight, tho and that’s a good thing, right?

Till Later

Convo with Daddy while watching an interview with Melinda from American Idol:

Daddy: Do you think she wears a wig?

Me: I don’t know. The people at work call her Shrek.

Daddy: Why?

Me: Because she doesn’t have a neck.

Daddy: Oh, that’s mean. I think she’s pretty.

Me: Daddy, do you think I’m pretty?

*****Silence*****

 Update:

We walked and walked and walked and then walked some more. That is all!

I thought I was going to start my running regimen today, however, this ho is tired. My first flight was at 6:25  this morning, and I got in at 2:35 this afternoon. ‘Nuff said. I promise I’ll start tomorrow. Promise.

Still on VaCAY!

I thought I’d share my stats for the week. According to my father’s scale I’m down to 185.5 which means a 2.5lb decline in weight. That’s what the scales said and I’m sticking to it. What ebs!

Anyhoo, tomorrow I start my running regimen, so wish me luck!

I’m going on holiday! Much better spirits today, I took a happy pill. I will be away from the office for TWO weeks. YEAH! First, I’m headed to DC to visit the old man and have him spend his moolah on me. Then I’ll be in Houston hanging out with my sister! SO.MUCH.FUN.***

What was wrong with me yesterday? Hello, someone needed to turn their upside down smile the right way up. After I wrote that I felt like a brat. There are bigger issues in the world (pun intended). Anyhoo, I’m dealing with some stuff here, my 15-year old cousin was diagnosed with (throat?) cancer and that still doesn’t motivate me enough to quit smoking and I HATE my job. It’s always about me, huh? Well, it is my bloggie.

I’ve come up with an action plan effective on my return from 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue:
1) Experiment with this glycemic index thing
2) Switch up my cardio. I’ve always wanted to run, but I get this weird thing called a runner’s itch, it burns like holy hell. I’m going to start this program
3) Check my attitude, remind myself that it will take time.
4) Get laid (Dr. Oz says that on average one should have nookie at least 4 times a week, if that’s the case, I’m in a huge deficit)

 ***I’m bringing my workout clothes with me. In fact, I even asked my dad if he has access to a gym. Gold star for me!!

I get extremely jealous when people post significant weight loss. Especially those who lose 10 pounds in a week and all they did was stop eating a gallon of ice cream before bedtime. Whaaa? It’s not FAIR!!! I been working my ass off, watching my diet, cutting down on my ’socializing’ and the result are insulting (if not discouraging). Some days I am successful in reminding myself that scale doesn’t matter and what really matters how I’m feeling (looking). However, on days like today, I think that’s utter bullshit, if I wanted to feel better about myself, I’d do a line of blow. I’m working out to lose weight.

BTW- My thoughts today are a complete departure from yesterday. Yesterday, I was one hot beeotch. Every time I would pass the mirror or see my reflection in a window, I’d wink at myself, stare at my ass, and say damn she’s SEXAY and keep on walking.

Also, I’d like to note, that I’ve never done illegal drugs in my LIFE. And I’m just going through the motions right now. And that my issues are not hormonal And I think I might have split-personalities. Anyone know a good shrink?

Why do some women think is ok to strut around butt ass naked in the locker room? I understand that you must get naked in order to get into your gym clothes and naked before you jump in the shower, I’m ok with that. However, I’m not ok with you stripping down, frolicking from one corner to another, using the bathroom, combing your hair all in your birthday suit. That’s not cool. Please put some damn clothes on or at LEAST wrap a towel around your exhibitionist-ass. Because I need NOT know how your bush is trimmed! Didn’t you get the handbook on locker room etiquette? Apparently not. Sheesh!

Stats for the week:

Chest 38 (under breasts 35): Waist 36; Hips 40
Arms: left upper arm 12.5; right upper arm 13.
Legs: left upper thigh 24.75; right upper thigh 24.75
Size:12
Weight: 188

A planner I am not. I constantly forget to pack something, which is only realized during my 30 minute commute or when I’m sitting at my desk. Things that I forgot to pack this week thus far:

Monday - A fresh pair of undies to replace my sweaty ones after my noon workout. I went commando for the later part of the day - hey ain’t no shame in my game
Tuesday- My nutritious lunch which I painstakingly prepared the night before. I relegated myself to fruit and cheese for lunch
Wednesday - My I-pod!!!
Thursday - My shirt. I had to sneak away mid-morning on a Target expedition. BTW- they are having a sale on lounge capris….

In other news, I weighed myself yesterday after-work, when I think I’m my heaviest. I have a decline in weight, I’m not officially posting my weight result until Saturday, because I’m having trust issues with my scale

Till later,

Following Robin’s lead I signed up for this

Here’s my Story:

Growing up I’ve always been the big sister, even though I’m the youngest. My physique took after my father’s side of the family. My sister’s physique took after my mother’s side. Although I was bigger, I never considered myself fat, I was thick, big bone, fine, but never fat. I was always active, but never paid attention to what I ate. I fell under the school of thought, that you can eat whatever you want, just as long as you exercise – and boy did I eat.

Eating has always been my method of socialization and I would eat because everyone else ate. My father and I bonded over food. In high school, my friends and I would travel off campus to grab lunch at Taco Bell, Dairy Queen, Burger King, etc. In college, we would dine out at Bennigan’s, Chili’s. At work, we would go to the All You Can Eat buffets, and any restaurant that carried lunch specials. Often I would tag along because I didn’t want to feel left out, regardless of whether not I was hungry. Food is my crack and I its fiend.

Then in 2002, something happened: I experienced my first heartbreak in years. It was brutal, I became consumed with it. Constantly thinking about ‘him’, or what ‘he’ was doing, or if ‘he’ was dating someone else. It drove me crazy, so to keep my mind off ‘him’ I exercised and dieted. It kept me distracted and it worked, I lost a little over 30 pounds. I kept the weight off until 2004. Slowly the weight crept back. I stopped eating right and exercising.

Right now, I think I’m the biggest I’ve ever been in my life at 190 pounds. So I’m doing something about it. I decided to do something about it months ago, but only recently started taking action on it. Despite the title of my blog, my motivation is not the $1,000 - yes, it is a nice incentive and it forced me to get off my ass, but I’ve seem to have lost my swagger (my way of being, confidence). I need to get that back. I second guess every person who tells me I look good, who tells me I’m attractive, who asks me out on a date. I know that self pride and love shouldn’t hinge itself on pants size, but the person staring back at me in the mirror is not me and I do not care for her I want her to go away for good, hence the beginning of my weight loss journey.

Blah, a succinct adjective to describe yesterday. I was in a Blah-mood. I was trying to cut out all processed food for this week but really wasn’t successful. I munched on a bag of sunflower seeds (200 calories) all day and had a South Beach diet lunch (definitely processed food, but only 260 calories). I proceeded with my lunchtime cardio workout and did my strength-training exercises after work. I really think doing the strength training after work instead of lunchtime has cut down cravings. Afterwards, I cooked a dinner of a turkey-burger patty accompanied with a salad. Approximately thirty minutes later, I threw it all up. Nothing helped my tummy ache so I went to bed hungry and in pain and only consuming 460 calories all day, only to be awakened by the sound of my dog barking and the thunder and lightening resonating throughout my condo at 2 AM. Not good. I know it.

I had every intention of turning it around today. I packed a delicious lunch (leftover salad and chicken), cooked egg muffins for breakfast, pack three oranges all for my consumption through out my work day - only to leave it at home during my mad dash to my car. **Sigh**

So now, I’m munching on sunflower seeds and trying to figure out what I could possibly eat today.

I weighed myself today and I lost five pounds -despite the McDonalds, despite channeling David Hasselhoff during Happy Hour on Thursday. I’m not going to get too excited about the weight loss as it could be all a fluke. I did a total of 205 minutes of cardio this week! It wasn’t as difficult as I thought it would be. I did two sessions of my strength training class, I’m having problems with the arm curl machine, not that the weights are heavy, the machine is uncomfortable. I guess it has something to do with me being double jointed in my elbows, maybe not. I’m going to switch to free weights for my biceps.

My measurements are:
Height 5′7″
Chest 40.5 (under breasts 36): Waist 37; Hips 42.5
Arms: left upper arm 13; right upper arm 13.5
Legs: left upper thigh 25.5; right upper thigh 25.75
Size:14
Weight: 190

Next week, My goal is to wake up early enough to cook a nutritional breakfast.

Off subject - I’m to attend my first Indian wedding tonight. Exciting, no?